Dresden Fan...

Let's start with the back. One of my favorite fabric lines is Patty Young's Andalucia. I used it in a quilt for my granddaughter when it was first released. When it was rereleased this year in yummy new colors, I jumped on some yardage. And I didn't want to cut up that fun flower print, so I decided to save it for the back and use it as the color inspiration for my Dresden Fan quilt.

For the blocks I used aquas and greens and added one block in pink. I love how it pops out!

 The quilting flowed easily when I decided to quilt wavy lines concentrically on each block. A flower at each corner and a small flower in each center octagon completed it all.

There's a link on my free pattern page which takes you to this post on making the block.

Yeah! Another UFO off the list and a pretty quilt to snuggle under!  . . . Cindy

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Honey...

The first of two finished quilts I have to show this week. Yeah!

The pattern is Honey and on the cover of Modern Patchwork. The fabric is mostly Marmalade with some pieces from earlier lines by Bonnie and Camille. The lovely quilting was done by my local longarm quilter Candy.

The back of the quilt has the aqua houndstooth print from Vintage Modern. Oh how I love that print!

I changed the pattern a bit by not using any of the half hexagons that border the quilt. I love how it floats and is a little off-center. A completely different look from the original.

And I have to share with you my Birthday/Christmas gift to myself. This set of Patchwork measuring cups and spoons is adorable. They're from West Elm - a little splurge that just makes me happy! . . . Cindy

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Lame Brained.

Everyday is a learning experience, it seems.
I am finding out what I can do, and what I cannot do, in my present state of recovery.

I thought, oh so mistakenly, that I could thread my little Leclerc loom for dish towels.

Winding the warp was ok, and I did thread the loom, over two days, but the price was steep.
Two full days of misery ensued.

You don't know..............and I KNOW you don't pay attention, because I didn't either.........how many fine, tiny, movements you do with your cervical spine......your neck.  You lean your head in, and those vertebrae in your neck tip and slide and pivot.  Even when you eat........watch yourself next time you pick up a fork, you tilt your face in. That movement is 'allowed' by your cervical spine.  C1 and C2 are responsible for all the rotating, tilting, sliding, that allows you to move your head.

Since my surgery, I have had sharp pains on occasion, in both ears.  I also have had issues opening my mouth wide enough to eat some things.  All of this was new, and a mystery.

Here is a picture of your cervical spine. Looking at it helped me to understand my limitations, at least for now...........I have two titanium rods fusing C1, C2, and C3.   It's really no wonder I still have pain, I guess.
Not to mention the hole in my head.

 


 Two steps forward, one step back.  Or is it one step forward, and two steps back?
Well, whatever.  The short answer is, I'm back on the couch with Roy.

I can walk, however, because that does not require me to bend my head forward.  I walk with the 'best posture in town' per DH.
So Roy gets his 3 mile hike every day of the week.

Sydney says:

Walking is highly overrated.

Someone asked about my shawls, and what the threads consisted of.
I have to confess, my shawls are pretty much like mystery soup.  There is a little bit  of everything in them.
I pull down a couple of spools off the shelf, that speak to me.......and then just keep walking around, mixing and matching, muttering to myself until I have 10 or so that I think look good with each other.

Then I take a piece of plain paper, and cut a piece from each cone, and tape them all together, to see what they will look like.
So there is chenille, there is wool, cotton, polyester, rayon, you name it.
They definitely turn out to be one of a kind, and that's the way I like it.   Sometimes the color choices surprise even me.
When it comes to the actual weaving, I change weft colors for each shawl.  On the loom right now, there is enough to do about 7-8 shawls, so I definitely have room to play with color.
One weft is midnight blue chenille, one will be purple chenille, and one turquoise chenille, one magenta.
One is a blend of many colors.

There are many more talented weavers out there than me.  I think that every weaver just needs to find what really moves them, what kindles their passion to keep weaving.
Mine is crazy color, and  a lot of spontaneity. 
Now if my head and neck would just get with the program.
Damn.

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Thanksgiving sewing...

Hope you all had a great Thanksgiving! I enjoyed cooking for more than 2 for a change. Did I ever tell you that I cook much like I quilt? I rarely have a list when shopping and just pick up what looks and feels good at the moment (much like fabric). When I get it home I have to figure out what I'll do with it (much like fabric). This year I made fresh cranberry sauce and added all-fruit peach pops that I had leftover from the girls' visit this Summer. A bag of apples became our Thanksgiving dessert topped with my favorite butterscotch chip oatmeal cookie. My experimenting gets results that are sometimes good and sometimes not (much like quilting). I do hope to remember my recipe when it turns out well!

Not one for crowds, my shopping consisted of a little cyber-shopping only. It left a nice long weekend for some sewing. I've been thinking about trying to finish up my WIPs and start the new year with a clean sewing slate. I'm not alone, Katy and Jessica recently posted the same resolution. So hopefully you'll see a lot of finishes in the next several weeks...

I have a few new bags on my list. First up is the Zig Zag bag from Zakka Style.

This was a fun bag to make and I'm happy with how it came out. I used natural linen and some prints from Chicopee.

 The back side of the bag is solid linen and I quilted it with a pattern of straight lines in 3 colors.

Also accomplished this weekend...

Hexagons in Loulouthi flannel. I've had this cut for a while and it literally took a few hours to sew it together.

The pattern is Rosalie from Valori Wells. These hexagons are big! 10" tall. And the AMH flannel is sooo soft - I wish you could feel it :)

And finally a couple of bindings finished. Watch for these finished quilts this week!  . . . Cindy

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Everyday gifts.

 

My two girls. Sporting the hats that Mimi made them.  Cousins, one year apart, but oh, how they love each other.  It's amazing, and makes my heart sing.  Gabby.  Ava.

What a gift they are.

Usually, I am gearing up right now for the Christmas in the Country event, which always happens the first weekend in December.  It is an OPEN HOUSE, and about 12-13 people participate.  Only a couple, like me, are open year round.  Most of the participants decorate and open their homes to sell their handcrafted wares.

I opted out this year, to everyone's amazement.  I didn't want to be obligated to it, committed, and worrying about not being able to do it justice.

Instead, I said, the studio will just be "OPEN", to whomever drops in.  No pressure, no stress.

I will make some Greek Honey cookies, because that is a Christmas tradition, and I will just be there weaving, or knitting, drinking tea.

If I have a couple of these mobius shawls done by then, terrific.  But if not, that's ok, too.

How ya' liking this new, laid back me???

No, I am not smoking anything.  

I am just accepting of everything in this life I am living.

I was made aware of the importance of gratitude about 20 years ago, when I found Al Anon.
I found it amazing that I had never really paid enough attention to it.

Now, of course, it takes on even a more poignant meaning to me.

Ah, gratitude.
Sometimes, when I am sitting in the sunny upstairs landing, weaving at this loom, I could cry.
With joy, that I can still do this. I can still weave, from the beginning process of warping the loom, to throwing the shuttle and watching the fabric appear.
And I can still do it well.
What a gift.

 

It's not all roses though.

Some mornings, like this one, I wake up and think my head is exploding.

I move slow.

I take my time.

I eat quickly so I can take Motrin.

And I wait, hopefully, for some relief.

Some times I wonder.
Is this my life, forever??
Will I always be fighting this headache, and always be living this pain?
Will I ever feel normal again?  Will I ever EVER have a day without a headache?

Then another voice, other than mine spewing forth worry and doom, is whispering in my ear.

Your life may change a dozen more times.  TODAY, this day, headache or not, is YOURS.
Make the best of it.
The very BEST. OF. IT.
Get over yourself.

You see those clouds??  They are dark, LOOMING, full of potential storminess.
But like me, I bet what you really find yourself looking at, is the sun, the light, the promise that it will break through and light up your world.
Am I right?

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Light Bulb moment.

 WARNING: Photos unrelated to text.  Just sayin.

The other day, while I was talking to Cupcake, (I lust for that name, btw) .....I realized something big.

A recent comment from a friend got me thinking about it......she said, "that headache has kind of DEFINED you for some time."
Ya think.
But seriously, that's the truth.  As it persisted, month after month, and sometimes became so severe that I could not function in my normal way, then yes, it did begin to be the guide that I structured my collapsing life around.  And it did take every single waking thought. Trying to diagnose it, trying to manage it, trying to find some relief, trying..............to understand what was happening to me.
 For all of 10 months, I struggled to find some ground where I could relate, where I could find a transition to this new definition of myself,  from the old definition of who I have been all my life............yup, a workaholic.
Are ya' with me?

Then the knife.  Six hours, two surgeons, and who knows how many sharp instruments, and now I am finding that I am defined by neither of those things.

My headache is becoming  (hallelujah) manageable.   I have a bag of tricks, that actually work to diminish my headache to dullness.........rest, medicine, massage, refraining from doing things that cause spasm, meditation.
And whether the doctors rearranged my brain, or this is just a natural conclusion to my whole experience, I find that being a workaholic just doesn't inspire much interest in me  anymore.

Stop the train. OMG.  I can't even believe I said that, much less FEEL it.
But it's true.
I am finding joy in putting balance into my days, and sometimes I feel like I have returned from a foreign place, and I am learning to live all over again.

When I was growing up, Dear Dad taught me what was important.
Work.
Money.
And if anything that you did as work, did not result in money, then it was stupid.
End of lesson.

Now why I did not take to heart  the lesson that my mother was living, instead,  I have no idea.
She slept until 9am.  After her household chores, which were not too heavy with just she and my father and I there, she was free to amuse herself.  And she did.  She was an accomplished gardener, and she loved to sew.  She did both, and she did them well.   Other than bowling on Tuesday mornings, which she did faithfully, she stayed in her own little corner of the world, and did just exactly what she wanted.  She made dinner, nothing gourmet.........she was not into it, and then on to her other addiction........TV.  She has watched a million movies and some of them multiple times.
She was never concerned about money.  My father made it, and gave it to her.
She was never concerned about work.  When she came to this country in 1946, and her new husband said he did not want her to work, she settled into that dogma like a trooper.
She had several new Toyotas back when NO ONE ELSE WE KNEW had new cars.
My father fetched her fresh popcorn from the movie theater every evening........no lie......so she could munch while glued to the television til midnight.  Not so late, when you sleep until 9.
THEN, he bought her a full size theater style popcorn machine, so she could make her own.
But she didn't.  He made it.  Big surprise.

But I did get my inclination to create from her, and for that I'm grateful. Dad had nothing to do with my addiction and passion for  fiber arts.

But what now,   now that I have discovered Dad was wrong about the money thing?  Oh, I've known it in theory for a long, long time.  But I still worked like a crazy person every day of my life.
So NOW, I have to rethink, re-plan, redo. It's not enough to just know in my head that every day is a gift, and that all of it is precious, I have to  ACT on it, accept it, and discard all that nonsense that I have dragged around, that money making,  task oriented, compulsive, driven behavior, that I've been doing since I could walk.

I am practicing just that, every day.
This is a warp I wound today, for dish towels.  Just because I wanted to.

 It is all new, this amusing yourself bit.
But I'm pretty sure I can get it.

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Give thanks.

I have tried to put some balance in my days.  So first thing, I walk Roy, take care of stuff at home, and then go to the studio.  I only stay at the studio for about 3-4 hours.  That's about my limit.  Anything more makes my neck start to spasm, and ache.

I do a little weaving, light stuff, no rugs.

This is a scarf I just made with some yarn I bought on the sale rack at Joann's fabric.
I just have to tie the fringe and wet finish it.
Thought you might like to see it.

 

 Last night, while I was making pumpkin pie, chocolate pie, and banana cream pie, I decided to make a pumpkin roll.  I have never made one in my life, but I have been wanting to, so I did.

 Let me tell you, I made a mess.

 

 But it was really much easier than I thought it would be.  And it was delicious.
I rolled mine in walnuts.

 

I love seeing my children, and their children.  Everyone is busy, so holidays are special when we all get together.  I also love feeding them, especially their favorite pies.

It is a particular joy to have them devoured each time.

  News Bulletin:

The Kingsbury General Store was burglarized.  Apparently, they were looking for jewelry, and when they didn't find any, they at least had the decency to not destroy property.

Since I really can't afford a security system, I thought I would do the next most obvious thing.

I left them a note.

 

 

DH says that won't work, but hey, you never know. 

I finally got my next shawl warp on the loom upstairs, and I am ready to weave.

It is so beautiful, and it will kill me to only weave a little bit every day.

But today is a day of gratitude.
Remember?
Like every day should be, really.

 

 I AM grateful:
 to HAVE this lovely studio...
......to have a good friend to help me get this warp on, when I can't bend over long enough to do it myself  (thanks L)..................
....for a fantastic family who loves my pies...........
...............that I am able to MAKE those pies.........
..that my pumpkin roll was a success..............
.....for this incredible weaving experience waiting for me, even if I  can't weave all day long......

 for warm, sunny, November walks with my buddy boy, Roy....

and for all of you, my faithful blogging friends, who come back here day after day, offering your support, encouragement, and concern.
I am blessed in so many ways.

 Sometimes, it's just good to count those things that you're grateful for.  While you're busy counting, it's easy to forget the things that don't make the list.
That's what I'm talking about.

 

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Change is good.

My days are sure different than they were a year ago.  I am not the workaholic that I once was.

It's a drastic change.

Truth be told, I thought nothing would ever slow me down, nothing short of the end of my life.

But then, I didn't plan on brain surgery.

I found some old pictures of weaving from back when I actually was productive.  I know I will weave rugs again, just not like I used to.

I will always be attracted to the color and texture of rag rugs.

'

 

Amazingly, I see the value of slowing down.    Suddenly, I will be paying attention, savoring the moments, not pushing myself to produce.   I will be mindful of every throw of the shuttle.

Grateful in fact.

 

As I find myself getting better every day, I find myself thinking a lot about what I want to do with the rest of my life.

I have been on a strange journey this past year, and it has had a huge effect.

 

I have been contemplating my bucket list.  I think everyone should have one.  It's just that as you get older, and experience life changing events,  you are more inclined to pay attention to it.

Aren't there things that you love, things that you wish you had in your life,  things you could be doing if you wanted to?  Things that you put off, for one reason or another, thinking that you will do it.........later?

When is later?  

That's what I'm asking myself.

 

I'm making a list.  And it's not my Christmas list, either.

But a list should just be a reminder, nothing more.  Just a whisper in your ear.

 

 

We live our lives on so many different levels.   One thing I've noticed is that I live a lot of my life in my head, in the future.  When today, really, is all that I have.

And today is good enough.


 

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