I do apologize for my lackadaisical blogging. My only excuse is the truth.
I am having trouble with my life.
Managing it through daily pain.
Trying to keep my sense of humor, my perspective, my sense of purpose, that has never failed me in the past.
But then again, I have never experienced anything like this.
I came in from a short walk, my husband was in his recliner.
I put my fingers on either side of his head, on his temples, and pressed hard. He winced.
Then I pressed on his face, around his eyes, hard, he moaned.
He said, when I took my hands away, "what was that??"
I said, "That's the way I feel every day. I wanted someone to know."
Pathetic, I fear.
But sometimes it does seem like I am in this place that I can't explain, and that truthfully, is hard for other people to hear about.
People that don't know me well, and can't tell from my expression, think I am just fine.
I have gotten pretty good at hiding just how much pain I walk around with.
What happened to May and part of June........when my headache had dulled down so much I almost felt normal?
I keep reminding myself of that. Telling myself that it could happen again. It could.
I pray for the breaks, however short they are. I take them and relish every minute of them.
Last night I dreamed that a little, bald man whispered in my ear, he said, "Don't worry, I've got this. I will take care of your headache.".
If only.
The chicks are settled in. Bart is being a gentleman, so far. Bossy, but not mean, yet.
Eight hens, and a rooster.......sounds like a perfect little group.
Weaving a bit, here and there.
Still in love with my Swedish band loom. Working on a guitar strap right now.
But regardless of how hard life can be sometimes, no matter how many losses and set backs there are, there is always PURE JOY.
It often comes in small packages.
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